Charon only managed one word...

"Wha......hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!"

She held her right arm right in close to her ribs because they hurt so much as she laughed harder than she'd ever laughed before. Mortis was livid with rage but Charon couldn't help herself, the situation was so ridiculous and his statement was so way out of the ballpark as to be ludicrous! Eventually she had to step back to hang onto Alexanders arm, she was struggling to breath and her eyes were streaming with laughter. Alexander was now virtually holding her upright, genuine concern for her mental health beginning to crack the smooth exterior of his normally calm face. Even Jones seemed taken aback by Mortis twisted thought process. It took Charon a good ten minutes to stop laughing, during which time she asked for a microphone, Alex handed her it, not sure if it was the right thing to do.

"Oh my word! You are sooooooooooo waaaaaaaay off the mark! As for swearing, the only swearing will be this.....FUCK THE HELL OFF YOU UGLY, EVIL, FUCKED UP LUMP OF TWISTED, SICK DONKEY VOMIT! THE ONLY WAY I'D GO ANYWHERE NEAR YOU WOULD BE IF FOR SOME WEIRD REASON I NEEDED TO RAISE AN ARMY OF BLUEBOTTLE FLIES!"

The tirade continued for several more minutes and would have continued for much longer if Alexander hadn't wrestled the microphone from her hands. She wasn't best pleased as she swung round and now glared at Alex.

"I wasn't finished yet!"

Alex shook his head calmly and held her gently but firmly.

"This is a family show, your tirade is going to cost us dear..."

Charon tried to interrupt him but he spoke over her.

"No, listen to me, I didn't say I agreed with him....yes I know he's a fat, purple fruit loop with a dick the size of half an atom and I agree if he had a braincell it would die of loneliness.....Charon! I know! You need to calm down."

Ten minutes more and Alexander had managed to calm her down but with Mortis still in the ring it was making her more and more agitated......